“Some Nights” by fun.: My Story Behind the Song

By: Kiki Arochas  |  February 20, 2024

By Kiki Arochas, Staff Writer

In the past, I’ve analyzed songs that represented a central occurrence or feeling in an artist’s life. These tended to be tragic events that the artist wished to bring alive through song. But, “Some Nights” is different. There isn’t truly one focus; it’s more of a combination of scattered thoughts and feelings throughout a lifetime of fame and pain. For that reason, I wanted to approach this song differently than in the past. Rather than focus on what the song means to the artist, I will be focusing on specific verses that I believe have universal applications, explaining why the lyrics hit me hard on every listen. Rather than mentioning every single line, I will instead pick out parts in particular that spoke to my own life experience. 

Some nights, I stay up cashing in my bad luck

Some nights, I call it a draw

Some nights, I let negative thoughts and feelings overwhelm me. Sometimes in spite of all my blessings, I stay up reflecting on the things I feel insecure about, or otherwise upset me. Other nights, I just let it go. 

Some nights, I wish that my lips could build a castle

Some nights, I wish they’d just fall off

Some nights, I wish that my words could move mountains, start movements, change the world; I wish that I could truly make a difference. Some nights, though, after I’ve said something stupid, messed something up, I wish I couldn’t talk at all. 

But I still wake up, I still see your ghost

Oh Lord, I’m still not sure what I stand for 

No matter what thoughts I had the previous night, I still wake up. Life still goes on, and each day I’m faced with that same question: what do I stand for? 

(Oh-ooh-woah) what do I stand for?

(Oh-ooh-woah) what do I stand for?

Most nights, I don’t know anymore

I just don’t seem to know anymore. When I was young, everything was simple and straightforward. However, with each passing night, as I age, I learn new things about myself and the world, and realize a lot of the things that I thought were simple aren’t so simple anymore. 

Well, some nights, I wish that this all would end

‘Cause I could use some friends for a change

Some nights I wonder if I’m loved at all. If any of my friends and family really understand me. More so, if I really understand myself. If everybody is fake to a certain extent, do my friends only like the me I present? Or do they know me for who I am?

And some nights, I’m scared you’ll forget me again

Some nights, I always win (I always win)

It comes in waves, the good feelings and then the bad. Some nights my confidence is boundless, I see no hurdle I can’t jump; and other nights the pettiest of things keep me awake, drowning me in an ocean of self-doubt and nihilism. 

But I still wake up, I still see your ghost

Oh Lord, I’m still not sure what I stand for, oh-oh

(Oh-ooh-woah) what do I stand for?

(Oh-ooh-woah) what do I stand for?

Most nights, I don’t know

But again, life goes on. Whatever thoughts, epiphanies, or emotions I had the previous night, I trudge forward, still struggling to answer that most basic of questions. Who am I? What do I stand for? What will I fall for?

Most nights, I don’t know. I still don’t know.